if u've watched the lovely movie Chocolat, u'd know the character Johnny oh-so-devastataing Depp played. or rather, the group of people he belonged to in the show.
the heretics. the outcasts. the univited.
sometimes i wonder if the real reason that i worship the ground Depp walks on is because the roles he chooses to play are almost always of that category (apart from his rogue-ish good looks). how he deliberately alienates himself from the cookie-cutter superficialities of Hollywood and sets himself apart in France with muted elegance.
perhaps my inclination towards the Anti-establishment spirit stems from a whole lorryload of personal experiences and simply an innate desire to wage war against the mainstream.
but i find myself caught in the middle of the two extremes most of the time - the role that i play in real life is never really entirely the free spirit i long to be. the people i have to associate with are mostly straightlaced folks who believe that skipping a day of school is cardinal sin.
and thus, the inability to be fully the wholesome girl-next-door or the rebel-without-a-cause has led me into unacceptance from either side. which is frustrating, of course.
Circumstances force me to smile through gritted teeth and behave cordially, like some stiff upper-lipped dame who secretly wants to twist off the neck of every other equally stiff upper-lipped hypocrite - who probably harbours the same secret wish as me.
quite pathetic, isn't it. you feel this way, but have to act another way. so that harmony will prevail, and to save yourself from being completely abandoned by the system.
**
i don't know how Depp does it exactly. how he plays his game and have the world clamouring after his elusive charm, despite him not giving a damn about the whole Fame thing. to me, living Life the way he does is probably the one thing that i long to achieve. that is, really not giving a bloody damn.
which is perhaps why he is so sought after in the first place - everyone loves a pai kia, but nobody really dares to become one. hence, you imagine yourself to be like that, whilst exploring the possibilities of such within the fictitious characters played on and off-screen by insert-favorite-rebellious-actor-of-choice.
**
wee displays of rebellion are usually pure idiocy, tis true. but playing by the rules all the time and being bound by an unknown fear/guilt is surely even more ridiculous.
go on. throw caution to the wind. for once.
the heretics. the outcasts. the univited.
sometimes i wonder if the real reason that i worship the ground Depp walks on is because the roles he chooses to play are almost always of that category (apart from his rogue-ish good looks). how he deliberately alienates himself from the cookie-cutter superficialities of Hollywood and sets himself apart in France with muted elegance.
perhaps my inclination towards the Anti-establishment spirit stems from a whole lorryload of personal experiences and simply an innate desire to wage war against the mainstream.
but i find myself caught in the middle of the two extremes most of the time - the role that i play in real life is never really entirely the free spirit i long to be. the people i have to associate with are mostly straightlaced folks who believe that skipping a day of school is cardinal sin.
and thus, the inability to be fully the wholesome girl-next-door or the rebel-without-a-cause has led me into unacceptance from either side. which is frustrating, of course.
Circumstances force me to smile through gritted teeth and behave cordially, like some stiff upper-lipped dame who secretly wants to twist off the neck of every other equally stiff upper-lipped hypocrite - who probably harbours the same secret wish as me.
quite pathetic, isn't it. you feel this way, but have to act another way. so that harmony will prevail, and to save yourself from being completely abandoned by the system.
**
i don't know how Depp does it exactly. how he plays his game and have the world clamouring after his elusive charm, despite him not giving a damn about the whole Fame thing. to me, living Life the way he does is probably the one thing that i long to achieve. that is, really not giving a bloody damn.
which is perhaps why he is so sought after in the first place - everyone loves a pai kia, but nobody really dares to become one. hence, you imagine yourself to be like that, whilst exploring the possibilities of such within the fictitious characters played on and off-screen by insert-favorite-rebellious-actor-of-choice.
**
wee displays of rebellion are usually pure idiocy, tis true. but playing by the rules all the time and being bound by an unknown fear/guilt is surely even more ridiculous.
go on. throw caution to the wind. for once.

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