especially for you
such morosity has come over me as i flipped thru the photo albums of yesteryears (okay, just about 2 years ago) out of sheer boredom and impending insanity from the impossible neurological notes. but i digress.
wat struck me the most was the radiance that just shone thru from evry genuine smile i had in evry photo. where has that joy gone to now?
**
perhaps it was because i was simply so happy back then in jc, when i still trained together with my dearest ruggers. this bunch of girls was the best thing that had happened to me in a long time. the emotional support and encouragement they gave me was the only reason why i pushed on week after week, training till late, having to deal with the immense workload and pressure. i remember how i used to watch the classroom clock ever so fervently, attempting to will it to strike 5 so that i could jump outta my seat and bounce all the way to the field and begin the gruelling training session. yes i was enthusiastic like that.
these girls are the most positive people around. even i, the chronic ah lian, was infected by their energy and optimism. they listened patiently when i whined incessantly about being stressed. they accepted me wholeheartedly for who i am. and they always promised to face the shit together with me.
wat was so special about our bond was how there was nary an ounce of jealousy, malice or bitchiness at all. it was just pure good fun and sincere love for each other. instead of competing to be the best player on the field, we were more interested in enjoying each other's company and doing evrything together.
it makes me sad to recall all the memories we shared together and how going to school meant yet another day of getting to see and talk to these wonderful girls. that gave me so much strength to embrace watever-may-come. and now we've all drifted apart in our endeavours and become overwhelmed by our present lives, with little time to spare for catching up on each other's lives.
i will always miss the times when we had sentosa & changi airport outings, shared homemade cheesecake and apple crumble, ran up and down the field in the middle of the night, dunked each other into birthday cakes, mugged in the library and taking rugby breaks, teased coach relentlessly behind his back, prayed together b4 the Big Game, and crumpled into a teary heap on the field thereafter. irreplaceable memories, these are.
heck. i just miss you girls too much.
**
lately i look at myself now in dismay and wondered where is the sunshiney girl that i used to be in jc. all that's left is a very worn out and mentally exhausted cynic. without anything to look forward to evryday.
sometimes i wish i still have a group of close frens in school to belong to and to draw the source of joy and support from. the reason why i shld enjoy going to school and doing wat i do.
perhaps i was always too much of a Taker, and it's time for me to give it all back. but right now, i'd just like to reminisce.
wat struck me the most was the radiance that just shone thru from evry genuine smile i had in evry photo. where has that joy gone to now?
**
perhaps it was because i was simply so happy back then in jc, when i still trained together with my dearest ruggers. this bunch of girls was the best thing that had happened to me in a long time. the emotional support and encouragement they gave me was the only reason why i pushed on week after week, training till late, having to deal with the immense workload and pressure. i remember how i used to watch the classroom clock ever so fervently, attempting to will it to strike 5 so that i could jump outta my seat and bounce all the way to the field and begin the gruelling training session. yes i was enthusiastic like that.
these girls are the most positive people around. even i, the chronic ah lian, was infected by their energy and optimism. they listened patiently when i whined incessantly about being stressed. they accepted me wholeheartedly for who i am. and they always promised to face the shit together with me.
wat was so special about our bond was how there was nary an ounce of jealousy, malice or bitchiness at all. it was just pure good fun and sincere love for each other. instead of competing to be the best player on the field, we were more interested in enjoying each other's company and doing evrything together.
it makes me sad to recall all the memories we shared together and how going to school meant yet another day of getting to see and talk to these wonderful girls. that gave me so much strength to embrace watever-may-come. and now we've all drifted apart in our endeavours and become overwhelmed by our present lives, with little time to spare for catching up on each other's lives.
i will always miss the times when we had sentosa & changi airport outings, shared homemade cheesecake and apple crumble, ran up and down the field in the middle of the night, dunked each other into birthday cakes, mugged in the library and taking rugby breaks, teased coach relentlessly behind his back, prayed together b4 the Big Game, and crumpled into a teary heap on the field thereafter. irreplaceable memories, these are.
heck. i just miss you girls too much.
**
lately i look at myself now in dismay and wondered where is the sunshiney girl that i used to be in jc. all that's left is a very worn out and mentally exhausted cynic. without anything to look forward to evryday.
sometimes i wish i still have a group of close frens in school to belong to and to draw the source of joy and support from. the reason why i shld enjoy going to school and doing wat i do.
perhaps i was always too much of a Taker, and it's time for me to give it all back. but right now, i'd just like to reminisce.
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